Discombobulated relationships can set off an avalanche of rotten life experiences which can profoundly affect, deteriorate, and diminish a person’s success and destined pathway in life.
Once broken, a highway through hell predictably becomes one’s passport in emotional entanglements, emotional impoverishment, and emotional struggles which leaves a devastating imprint!
Sad!
Those were my prevailing thoughts upon reading one of the most riveting and tragic letters that I have ever received from a fan. By all accounts, my new admirer’s feelings have been “locked up” in a coffin for a mighty long time.
On a lark, this incarcerated black man opened his chest cavity to me and unquestionably surrendered the most introspective and heart-felt monologues that I have ever received via a letter in quite some time!
What impenetrable trust!
Steven’s letter ripped my emotions. Steven’s letter eclipsed my rationality. Steven’s letter ratcheted my rawness. Steven’s letter razed my sanctuary. Steven’s letter suspended my joviality. Steven’s letter struck a nerve ending. Steven’s letter left me bare!
Bottom-line, Steven’s letter rubbed me, both good and bad, on so many different levels!
Felt my repertoire of good mood responses being evicted from its “happy place.” Slowly, this stranger’s agony reduced me to helplessness. Finally, my feelings migrated to despair.
Needed, somehow, to recapture my harmonious temperament before it reached to octane levels.
Whew!
The need for human contact, bonding, authentic love, healthy relationships, and warm attachments is ultimately desired.
Steven, like thousands and thousands of others, grew up into a pathologically unstable environment. Unfortunately, his “earth angels” and loving caregivers (mother and grandmother) were snatched from him with their untimely deaths during his formative years.
Left stranded and abandoned to the elements, this man-child spent his maturation periods without adult surrogates. Void of positive interactions, this man-child was left to his own devices, instinctive wits, and singlehandedly fended and scratched day-to-day for survival.
Overwhelming!
Eventually, susceptible to an evil, low-down enchantress, a domestic quarrel fueled with lies now subjects this self-made entrepreneur, aspiring musical juggernaut, and gem to five years in prison! It’s worth noting that previously he had never had any interactions with the criminal justice system.
There’s no doubt in my mind, “insufficient nurturing” led him spiraling towards this negative seductress.
A week earlier….
During a family caucus, had nonchalantly ignored a compliment that family-friend, Ron, had given to me. The purpose of the powwow was to acquaint godparents, Ron and Jean, to the contents of the family’s wills and other business-related matters germane to the health and welfare of my minor daughter.
Additionally, because of my unconditional and agape love for my daughter, wanted to ensure that she would avoid being “tossed around” like Steven because her mom and dad failed to have addressed her survival needs!
Anyway, upon conclusion of our discussion, Ron and his wife were impressed that my husband and I had not only finalized our business affairs, but we had also pre-selected designated “godparents” to serve as caretakers of our child, as well as, had expertly and astutely arranged for an orderly transition of our personal affairs and estate upon our deaths.
Again, at that time, had not fully appreciated nor processed the depths of Ron’s compliment until I had received Steven’s letter.
After reading this letter, learned that Ron and Jean were “spot on.” So often, as parents, we act fortuitously about life and assume that our children will be fitted with and supervised by caring adults who are adequately equipped to assist our children with handling adverse environmental problems or situations.
Sometimes, it’s to the contrary!
Although there’s no magic bullet or magic formula that can offset life’s monumental and detrimental experiences, my husband and I had enough foresight to have paired Mantha with veteran, seasoned, unflinching, compassionate, loving, trusting, inspiring, and caring role models, (and, if need be, azz kickers, too) who will provide her with a rich blend of motherly and fatherly oversight and advice.
We thank Ron, Jean, Beverly, Jackie (Baltimore) Jackie (Jacksonville), Wesley, and Aleizah for agreeing to love Mantha in her parents’ absentia. Without a doubt, under your stewardship and coupled with your positive reinforcements, Mantha is well-poised for continued success!
Extensive travel in this journey called “life” has allowed me to elucidate to the Steven’s of the world by motivationally raising them from their chronic despair and alienation phase to miraculous thresholds of optimism.
Strongly believe that Steven has the internal “tool kit” and is cognitively equipped and spiritually endowed to develop and to begin anew. So, in spite of his temporary imprisonment, suggest that he begin working towards the eventuality of his release and on his future roadmap to success.
Finally, Steven, remember that “insufficient nurturing” should have taught you to stop picking up rhinestones when you are obviously a heck of a diamond!
