Lately, one can find me walking solitarily up to five miles a day at my local park. Relish this solitude because this activity renders me the serenity to decompress my noggin from the day’s minutia and from the irritating nuances one must periodically contend with in this life.
Sojourning is spiritually therapeutic because it also avails me with an uninterrupted communion with God as I inquire from Him clarity to those inner-most secrets and forbidding issues that require an expedient resolution.
Finally, as a result of heaving myself nearly to death for two “dog gone” hours, wishfully hoping that a certain amount of my stubborn cellulite finds permanency with someone else’s thighs other than mine!
(Laugh out loud)
Nevertheless, similarly to the circuitous motions that I physically make on the track, the concept of “redefined” relationships has consistently circulated non-stop within my mind and has even taken up an inordinate amount of emotional energy, as well as, residency within my heart.
Upon closer examination and of course obviously from this writer’s perspective, suddenly becoming aware that the three most important people in my life have subtly and gradually shifted their role, their relevancy, and their relational importance as it pertains to me within their respective lives.
Frankly, in two of these cases, I surmised that both of these individuals are clueless of the evolutionary change that I am witnessing from afar. However, “perception is reality” and painfully my sensibilities detected that the third individual is cognizant of our newly “redefined” friendship which, sadly, has crushed my psyche.
Lordy!
Anyways, once heard that when children cross over from the compliant and obedient age of 12 to the “I already know everything” stage of 14, get ready to call the damn Army because the formerly serene relationship that was shared with that child will overnight become an agitated, tumultuous, and finagling battle. Without warning, apparently Satan has recruited, serenaded, and then indoctrinated our kids!
Not over my dead body!
As an out-of-date (proud of it) mom who vainly struggles to live with a hormonal and scatter-brained teenager, it is so tempting to throw my daughter’s junk to the curb and tell her to “get the hell lost” as my frayed nerves can’t handle another verbal “I live in America and I have freedoms” diatribe!
Hey, smart-al-ecky kids. Instead of sparring with your emotionally drained parents, how about taking all of your tit-for-tat commotion along with your freaking freedoms and vamoose from out of our houses!
(Laugh out loud)
With that in mind, instead of me committing hari-kari or contemplating a Russian roulette session at the Giggetts’ household, I just quietly seek refuge on the track so that I can harness the needed peacefulness from the stillness of nature before losing my one everlasting nerve!
(Laugh out loud)
Meanwhile, this is what I concluded…
This “mommy dearest” is indeed overly-protective of her favorite (only) daughter. Heck, in this shoot and then ask questions later “Zimmerman” state called F-L-O-R-I-D-A, aren’t you?
So, with that being my frame of reference, unapologetically, this tyrant rules with an “iron fist,” sprinkled with heavy-handedness, and tossed with such a formidable “my way or the freaking highway” attitude not very surprised that my parental style naturally conjures teenage rebellion, rebuke, and hostility.
Ugh!
Therefore, with great trepidation, decided to “redefine” my relationship with Mantha beginning with me taking itsy-bitsy steps towards loosening the mother-daughter reins. Plan on giving her more latitude in the decision-making process versus having me to always wield the proverbial hammer.
In return, all that I ask of her is not to bring saggin’ azz and his deadbeat cohorts into my life!
Sweet Jesus!
Metaphorically speaking, begun to sail some uncharted waters with my husband!
Long story short, for the past two years Nicholas has courageously battled one ailment after another. Triumphantly and miraculously, he has weathered the storms and rebounded victoriously!
Now this…
However, a recent medical diagnosis has radically “redefined” our relationship in more ways than one. Needless to say, I have been plagued with anxiety and understandably I am vexed about our new horizon.
Nevertheless, this is what I know for sure…
First, rest assured, Nick, that your love warriors will continue to surround you with the intestinal fortitude needed to combat this latest medical prognostication.
Second, now that we have recaptured our “sea legs” we will not allow this prognosis to have us to live the balance of our lives frazzled, in a melancholic fog, or in a fox hole. Until our epitaph is etched, we will proceed to live a bountiful life and adjust accordingly!
Remember, we got your back!
So, God, how did you know that someday I would be in dire need of a life line?
A professional relationship that began over two decades ago has morphed into Wesley becoming a surrogate uncle to Mantha, an honorary son to Nicholas, and a wonderful friend for my encumbered soul. We, wholeheartedly, thank him for adopting, loving, and caring for three comedic misfits!
And, we are truly blessed by the association!
Recently, thought that I had irretrievably damaged this friendship because of my blunt forthrightness regarding some possessional opinions that I had suppressed and some philosophical differences that I had harbored and passionately revealed.
Wesley’s reaction, though unspoken, was to expeditiously “redefine” our relationship by giving me the “cold shoulder” that was far worse than an Arctic or a Siberian winter. Overnight, the once endearing friendship we fondly shared had abruptly vanished and had degenerated to an irrepressible and deafening silence.
Would have preferred to scale the Great Walls of China rather than to have this once flourishing relationship become deduced to a “sudden death” status.
Lordy!
What I have learned for sure…
Time is an equalizer and compassionate healer. Hopefully, in “time” our dissension will dissipate and the “magic” that was originally the impetus, foundation, attraction, and core of our friendship will soon be rediscovered, rekindled, and restored.
Seriously miss my friend!
Until then, let the record show that I have truly met my match! Also, let the record show that since serendipity brought him into our lives, according to the Gospel of Mantha, Wesley’s role will not be “redefined” as he is definitely a permanent fixture, as well as, a beloved member of this family, forevermore!
(Laugh out loud)
Second Mantha’s motion!
