Time was that the phrase “coming out” was basically limited to the fun and frolicking of the Philadelphia Main Line and New York Society types. When a daughter of a socially prominent family reached a certain age, usually 18, her parents threw her a big party to introduce her into the world of parties, teas, society balls, charity balls, etc. so that she’ll find a young man in the same social set where the two families could arrange as much a corporate merger as a marriage. Love had absolutely nothing to do with it unless you take into account the love of big money. I was friendly enough with several people in those circles that I was invited to and attended a few of these affairs back in the early sixties. Basically, they were mundane catered dinner dance affairs with music by Meyer Davis or Guy Lombardo for dancing, just like bar or Bat Mitzvahs without the joy or passion. This was a serious business to get your daughter placed properly. After a few of these they grew tiresome as it was the same people at every event. The one party that I wasn’t invited to was Fernanda Wanamaker Wetherill’s party on Long Island in August 1963 that eventually turned into the trashing of the rented mansion by the Mitt Romney types of society boys. It made all the headlines all over the country, and this was the pre-coming out party.
Fast forward one year and I’m on the train to Ft. Knox, Kentucky to begin basic training. We were lined up alphabetically and sitting next to me was Francis D. (Dring) Wetherill, Fernanda’s brother in the flesh. We had known each other casually from being at these affairs together and we were to spend the next few months together and for the next 24 hours we were going to be sitting on the train together, so we got to know each other pretty well. He wasn’t that easy to take. You would think that being a scion of the Social Register that he would be the all around athlete and perfect person. Think again. He was an absolute slob with few if any of the human touches that makes one likeable. He was spoiled rotten and the most self-indulgent person I had ever met. For all his money he never had any cash in his pocket and he never had his own cigarettes which were 18 cents a pack at the PX. I threatened to quit smoking just to teach him a lesson. I used to tease him about not being invited to Fernanda’s bash and he would laugh and tell me I was lucky I wasn’t there because of all the damages that had to be paid for. We stayed friendly for several years after basic training, however he was going into the First City Troop, a cavalry unit that only dealt with the Social Register and you needed to have a couple of horses of your own to get in, so I didn’t see or hear from him again until we were both back in Philadelphia. F. Scott Fitzgerald was so right.
As we approach middle age (or even surpass it) our metabolism creates another type of “coming out.” That’s also serious business. Looks like diet and exercise is in the future for quite a while. The mirror is not your friend and unless you do something about it now a complete new wardrobe will be necessary. Not looking forward to it.
The next type of coming out has been around for several years and it refers to people who have kept their lifestyle choices hidden, as though in the closet for years. Not a healthy choice. Society overall has become more aware over the last few decades, yet there are some forces that will continue to react badly to same sex pairings and all other issues connected with the LGBT lifestyle. They will continue to pass laws restricting rights that are granted to other people and they will continue to bully and harass this minority until we as a society finally overcome it. Gains are made every day, either in small or large steps and we now have a president who supports equal rights for the GLBT community. In Orlando and in Orange County there is now Domestic Partner Registry even though gay marriage is not legal in Florida. At least it is a step in the right direction. So, let’s not give up hope; it is getting better. Coming out does not produce the kind of trauma it used to.
Orlando has been producing Gay Pride events for several years now and they just seem to be getting better. On Saturday, Oct. 6 the annual Come Out With Pride event was held at Lake Eola Park and it was huge. Several policemen estimated overall crowds during the day at 100,000 or more, and the fashion police would have been driven crazy walking up and down the park at some of the more bizarre outfits that were on display, and yet all of these people seemed absolutely normal. It was a day to celebrate, and celebrate they did, with food and clothing vendors, music concerts, great leather stuff, all kinds of social services, creative jewelry, fireworks displays and lots and lots of drinking. The parade started at 4:00 and lasted for most of an hour.
Participants in the parade were the usual suspects, however, there were some clear changes made. In video 1 The Out and Proud Veterans drum and bugle corps led off the parade followed by Darden Restaurants, a major employer in the area. Wells Fargo Bank leads off video 2 followed by Macy’s, SunTrust Bank, and Watermark Media. Disney leads off video 3 with a delay caused by one of those magnificent stallions doing what they do when you don’t want them to. Fear not! Disney has handled this before and a young man with a shovel and a trash cart follows those horses ready to clean up at a moment’s notice. What was unique about these corporate paraders is that their executives were in the parade marching with the working crews all in solidarity. It looks as though Don Reid Ford supplied the lion’s share of parade vehicles. The interest groups kept on coming, many of them throwing souvenirs, candy and beads at the crowds. Democratic political candidates abounded with nary a Republican in sight. Alan Grayson led the charge, followed by Linda Stewart (HD 47), Sean Ashby (HD50), Rick Singh (County Property Appraiser), Karen Castor Dentel (HD 30), Joe Saunders (HD49) and a few others who got lost in the crowd, notably Chris Pennington (SD13) and Randy Ross (Write in for something or other). Bringing up the rear in this video is Parade Grand Marshall, Debbie Gibson. Ms. Gibson will be performing later in the evening. Marching on video 4 are the night clubs and many support groups. More Corporate marchers, more clubs and support groups and the irrepressible Billy Manes are featured in video 5 which brings up the rear of the parade. Of course, it rained about 10 minutes after the parade ended. It was a perfect day to come out. Let’s look forward to the next one.