I Got Drunk Yesterday!
I got drunk yesterday and regrettably Alcoholics Anonymous won’t be able to cure my addiction. I got drunk yesterday and will skip any rehab advice from Dr. Drew. I got drunk yesterday and will ignore detoxification remedies that even you may suggest.
I got drunk yesterday but it was not from alcohol. Instead, my intoxicating state is from the blended whiskies of Keith Longmore (Chief Operating Officer of West Orlando News On-Line)!
For the record, my drink of choice is sweet tea and if asked I couldn’t tell you whether Keith consumes beer, wine, coffee, or even water. All that I know for sure is that upon conclusion of our executive meeting, I should have been arrested for a DUI (Driving Under the Influence)!
Have you ever been on the receiving end of Keith Longmore’s diatribe? Characteristically, I liken it to having a urinary tract infection. Any woman that has been afflicted with this infection could tell you that she is left with a constant desire to frequently urinate. In other words, upon interfacing with Keith, be prepared to “wet your pants.”
Keith’s idiosyncrasies are well-documented. He has little patience for the present generation of most blacks who he views as leisurely strollers in the quest for social, political, and economic justice. He has no tolerance for African-Americans who have lost their cultural identity or those who possess ambivalent feelings towards their own race or for others who have selected amnesia and have conveniently overlooked how collectivism trumped disfranchisement.
He has no compunction in using explosive expletives. Raising a ruckus by exerting his perceived radicalism, his racial assertiveness, and his unsettling expressiveness into the faces of the black and white political and religious establishment is his trade mark. He has no respect for those who are spectators by refusing to engage in any controversy that would benefit the underserved. Inevitably, stepping into the cross hairs of Keith Longmore is unpalpable—one must be prepared to leave in a drunken state!
I got drunk yesterday and admittedly I won’t stop drinking. I won’t stop drinking from Keith’s bottle of truth. I won’t stop drinking from Keith’s bottle of equality. I won’t stop drinking from Keith’s bottle of advocacy. I won’t stop drinking from Keith’s bottle of justice. I won’t stop drinking from Keith’s bottle of activism. I won’t stop drinking from Keith’s bottle of unadulterated honesty. And, I won’t stop drinking from Keith’s bottle of comeuppance.
Thanks, Mr. Longmore, for making me drunk. I am grateful for being the inheritor of your awakening, enlightenment, and love.
Fortunately for me, the outcome of our meeting was successful. Beginning in May, Keith has given me an opportunity of a lifetime. I will be debuting as a weekly columnist, and just like my new-found mentor and fellow warrior, I plan to make you drunk!